The Thrive Project Part 3:

Positive Feeling

This series of blogs from Charlie Unwin, an Olympic Performance Psychologist, is helping us bring you some practical tips on how we can build mental resilience while in lockdown. He's focussed on the following three pillars:

• Positive doing
• Positive thinking
• Positive feeling

Part 2 showed us positive thinking, the art of practising optimism and maintaining your attention on small everyday goals. We're now on part 3, looking at achieving positive feeling, by limiting news and using visualisation.

There are three exercises, much like the other sections. They're manageable for all of us, and hopefully, will fill you with positive feelings. 

Exercise 1

Filter the information coming in

The rate of digital innovation can be challenging to get your head around. We literally have a world of information at our fingertips. The benefits of this are overwhelming – just imagine if this was taken away from you now! The problem is that the human brain is struggling to cope with this deluge of information. 

Every thought we have creates an emotional ripple in the brain - called resonance - which is designed to attribute meaning to that thought. Sometimes this is big, and we’re very aware of the feelings it creates. Sometimes it’s unimportant and passes by almost unnoticed. But these ripples are always there, like an emotional tune to every thought we have. With so many thoughts playing so many emotional tunes, it’s no wonder we often struggle to make sense of the noise. As a result, we’re more likely to think negatively and prioritise poorly – making the situation worse for ourselves!

The best way of alleviating this noise and maintaining a clear, positive head is by limiting the outside information we consume and when we consume it.

Top tip

• Limit news to a manageable level. Studies show that our brains are starting to respond to supposed ‘Breaking News’ stories in precisely the same way they respond to a win on a slot machine in a casino. This can be very damaging to our mental health, therefore limit yourself to ONE news bulletin per day - in our household it’s at 6pm. Avoid the 10pm news before going to bed.

• Think local, not global. You cannot control events around the globe right now, but you will feel the emotional burden if you over-invest in them. Focus on what you can do within your community to make a small difference. By doing this, you’ll re-address your perception of being in control and feel much better in the process. Plus, you’ll make someone else feel better!

Exercise 2

Switching On and Off

The attitude of professional athletes has changed markedly over the past 30 years. In a quest to run faster, jump higher, and throw further, they used to focus on training longer and harder than their opponents. If they were training on Christmas Day, that was one day more than many of their competitors. The problem was that by continuously increasing the load, they could only go so far before burning out and getting injured. 

Soon, science started to show that the most effective athletes were the ones who planned their recovery as conscientiously as they planned their physical training. This started a movement that has continued to this day. It focusses on how to improve the rate and quality of recovery. Interestingly, 90% of performance-enhancing drugs are not designed to enhance strength or stamina directly, instead, they enhance recovery.

We can all learn from this because, in our quest to get things done and manage the emotional load of our day, we’ll only stay effective if we’re deliberate about switching off and allowing our mind and body to recover. If we limit the quality and quantity of recovery, we’ll only ever be at 70% effectiveness at best. In short, stress is okay, in fact, we need it to be effective. It’s a lack of quality recovery that causes so much damage.

Here are some top tips on making the most of your recovery:

• Prioritise sleep as much as possible. This is essential, and the new science of sleep is compelling. To learn more, I highly recommend the book Why We Sleep by Matthew Walker. 

• The two things that disrupt the quality and quantity of our sleep the most is alcohol (sorry to be a party pooper, but the research is very convincing), and lack of evening routine. Have a ‘golden hour’ before bedtime to help you wind down, in the same way, every night. 

• Punctuate your day clearly with ‘on’ and ‘off’ activities, so you know precisely whether you’re using energy or restoring it. 

Exercise 3

Visualisation

Why should you visualise?

Visualisation is a mental process that enables us to feel more prepared and confident about specific activities or life events. It’s a skill I use extensively with athletes preparing for high-pressure performances, surgeons preparing for complex operations, Special Forces operatives about to practice or conduct a dangerous mission, and musicians about to go out on stage. Visualisation is for anyone who wants to increase the quality of what they do and the confidence they do it with. 

These are extreme examples, but the reason we should all take time to practice visualisation is that it can help us to perform everyday activities with more confidence, more focus, more positivity, more patience and more connection. 

How does visualisation work?

You imagine going through an experience as accurately as possible in your mind. It primes exactly the same neural pathways in the brain as if you were actually doing it. Done well it even evokes the same feelings you would get in the real situation, which allows you to practice these emotions.

Sounds funny, but to get better at regulating our emotional reactions to certain situations or activities, we need to learn how to either accept these emotions or regulate them. For example, by training yourself to breathe deeply and relax whilst being in that situation. You can literally re-train how your mind and body respond to that situation. 

How do I visualise?

Take time out to do this at the beginning of every day:

1. Breathe - Start by focusing on your breathing - breathe deeply and rhythmically. Count in for five and out for five, and if your mind wanders just gently bring it back to your breath for two minutes.
2. Relax - On every out-breath focus on relaxing your body. Start with your head and face, working your way all the way down to your toes, releasing any tension as you breathe out. Repeat this until your mind is calm and still.
3. Visualise - Start to visualise your upcoming day in your head, living the key activities or moments in your mind one at a time. Imagine this as accurately as you can, as if you were there doing it. Notice any fluctuations in heart rate and mood while you imagine it, meeting them with a deep breath and relaxation. If you need to, go back over something and do it again until you do it the way you want to do it. Imagine living through each key part of your day relaxed, calm, positive, and confident.

Trust me when I say that doing this for 15 minutes can have a dramatic effect on how your day turns out, and the more you practice, the better you get.

Top tip

If you want to get good at this, let the Calm app help you. As the most downloaded app in the world, Calm is brilliant for quietening your mind, but you’ll need to do the visualisation element on top of this.

Charlie's recommendations:

Podcasts

Feel Better, Live well by Dr Rangan Chaterjee

Books

Why We Sleep by Michael Walker

Thrive by Arianna Huffington

Apps

Calm

A bit about Charlie

Charlie Unwin is a specialist in human performance and psychology. His clients include multiple Olympic Champions, England Football, elite Special Forces and The Royal Household. A former Army officer and GB athlete, Charlie is passionate about transferring the tools and techniques used by athletes and elite performers into everyday life, allowing more people to live well and achieve their potential.